Friday 18 July 2014

My worst fear.

Often I question myself, am I doing this right? I am good enough or not? You know my worst fear...Not living up to the expectations. Being a disssapointment.
We don't know what is there in our cards only thing we can do is trust the instinct and move one. But I wonder, what will happen when you turn out to be "not good enough for this world". Will your people still accept you?
The thing is I'm scared. I'm scared of being the next the dissapointment.
I regret some decisions in my life, and regret is not something  to live by. I wish I could be more expressive. To tell someone 'I love you', 'I miss you', 'I'm here for you,always'. Yet I never told them to anyone. And thats the thing I regret. These unspoken words, untouched feelings  burried deep down with regret. I want say so much to everybody yet I cant, because i'm a walking peice of irony.
I'm like that girl who can never console you during an ugly time but can always give you a shoulder to cry on. I'm here for you, ALWAYS even if you don't care..I want people to understand me, because I can talk 24 hours about random stuff but I can never tell you a bit my emotions.  I can never  work with my emotions, neither I can express them.

I want to be good enough for everybody, do something that'll make my parents proud, my friends smile and make myself content.

I wonder what I'm doing is right, is this enough.
So many unawnsered questions.

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